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Spielberg Gets Ideas From Children

Great leaders don't think they have all the good ideas. Instead, they humbly solicit ideas from everybody. Steven Spielberg is the most successful movie producer in the world. He's got plenty of creative ideas and has every right to tell the actors to sit quietly and allow him to tell them what to do. Yet, listen to actress Drew Barrymore tell how Spielberg worked with her when she was a young child in the movie "E.T." In Barrymore's own words...

This week, let's be careful not to write someone off as "just a freshman" or "too dumb to learn from." Every person we meet is great than us in some way. Spielberg is humble enough to learn from little kids. Rather than put others down, let's show  humble respect for others this week.   (Written by Steve Miller, Copyright May 6, 2002; Source: Drew Barrymore with Todd Gold, Little Girl Lost, Pocket Books: New York, 1990, p. 58) 

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Great Scientist Humble About His Knowledge

Some of us think that Sir Isaac Newton was just a guy who sat under a tree one day, felt an apple fall on his head, and decided to name the force gravity. But he was so much more. He has been called ''one of the greatest names in the history of human thought.'' Amazingly, he made major contributions to Mathematics, Physics, and Astronomy. This genius (and some of you will hate him for this) invented calculus, showed us how the universe is held together, and discovered the secrets of light and color. His book, Principia Mathematica, is considered one of the greatest single contributions in the history of science. Albert Einstein idolized him and said that his own work would have been impossible without Newton's discoveries.

Now, if you had accomplished all that heady stuff, wouldn't it be pretty easy to become incredibly proud? Rather than getting puffed up with pride, he saw his great intellectual accomplishments in perspective. This is what he said of himself shortly before his death:

''I do not know what I may appear to the world, but to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore, and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.'' (Isaac Newton, p. 308, World Book Encyclopedia, 1978)

Discussion Questions:

1) What were some of Newton's great accomplishments?
2) What do you think he meant when he said he viewed himself as "a boy playing on the seashore," finding pretty pebbles and shells, while "the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered" before him?
3) What disgusts you about people who get puffed up with pride?
4) How can we keep our accomplishments from going to our heads?
5) What's a specific area of your life that you could be more humble about this week?  

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Stephen was a 10th grader when he took his first writing job as a sports reporter for his hometown newspaper. His first assignment was to write a story about his school's basketball team. A player had broken a scoring record, making it big news in a small town.  

He wrote his first story and turned it into the editor. That man proceeded to put huge red lines through everything that he thought unnecessary. Stephen could have gotten mad at the editor for tearing apart his work. He could have ignored his comments, thinking that he knew quite well how to write. 

Instead, he took every comment to heart. Looking back, Stephen says that this editor's ten minutes of criticism taught him more than any of his English Literature, composition courses, fiction courses, or poetry courses in high school and college! 

Thankfully, he kept on writing and kept on learning. Today the world knows him as one of the most successful authors today -- Stephen King. You've probably seen some of the movies based on his books. 

This week, let's try to appreciate rather than resent the criticism and red marks we get from our teachers. Successes like Stephen King learn from criticism. (© Copyright 2002 Steve & Cherie Miller, On Writing, by Stephen King, Pocket Books, 2000, p. 56-58.)

Discussion Questions:

1) What did the editor do to Stephen's article?
2) How would most people have responded to this criticism?
3) What makes us boil up inside when someone criticizes us?
4) What can we say to ourselves to keep from getting mad the next time we see red marks on our papers or get verbal correction from teachers?  

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"Check Your Ego at the Door"

When many music legends came together in Los Angeles to record the song ''We are the World,'' the organizer posted a sign on the entrance of the studio that read, ''Check your ego at the door.'' You see, every singer was a star, but not everyone could have a solo. The project was a success because of working together. 

Some classrooms or sports teams need to put up a similar sign to remind all of us that we're here for the benefit of all, not our own glory. This week, let's walk into chorus or band or football practice remembering that we're there for the team, not to stroke our own ego's. When you go through the door to the locker room or classroom or band room, imagine reading a sign that says, "Check Your Ego at the Door." 

Discussion Questions:

1) Why do you think the organizer of "We Are The World" put the sign on the door? 
2) How does arrogance and pride hurt the performance of any group?
3) How does it make you feel when talented people throw their weight around and act better than other?
4) How can we keep our egos from hurting our friendships and team spirit?

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Walmart Founder Stays Humble

Sam Walton took Wal-mart from a good idea to the largest retail business in the United States in little more than 25 years. He also became the wealthiest man in America, with a net worth of over $6.8 billion. 

You'd expect a person of his wealth and achievement to be out of reach of the common person. But his hometown barber in Bentonville, Arkansaw, described him as ''just as common as an old shoe.'' Around town, he would drive his old pickup truck and wear his familiar baseball cap, often covered with hair from his bird dogs. His one story house wasn't in an exclusive neighborhood. 

On Wednesday nights he would accompany his wife to their church's pot luck supper, bringing his own covered dish. You have to wonder if his humility was a part of his success.

A writer for a marketing group said it was Walton himself who made Wal-Mart as great as it is. While proud people assume they are right, finding it difficulty to learn from other people, Walton had the ''most uncanny, most extraordinary'' ability to learn from people, to figure out who they are and what they want. He was more concerned about his customers than what he got out of it.   

According to Barnard, Walton's philosophy was ''If I can save a penny on the way I do business, I'll pass it along to my customers.'' But many other retailers operated with a ''If I can save a penny, I'll put it into my pocket'' philosophy. 

It's that servant heart that people saw when Walton would visit one of his stores and jump right in sacking goods for the checkers. Somehow, Walton kept his success from changing him. Let's think this week about how we can stay humble about our successes and not looking down on others. (Written by Steve Miller. Source: The Cincinnati Post, Sam Walton: The richest man in the U.S., by David Ivanovich) 

Discussion Questions:

1) What store did Sam Walton start?
2) Why do you think he retained his simple lifestyle even after he became fabulously wealthy?
3) What other people do you know that became vain and obnoxious after their success? 
4) How can we keep our successes from making us become snooty and obnoxious? 

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Nursing Student Learns That All Are Important

In her second year of nursing school, Joann Jones took a test that she never forgot. The last question read, ''What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?'' She thought it was a joke. Although she'd seen the lady, she'd never bothered to find out her name. She asked the professor if the last question counted toward the grade. The professor replied, ''Absolutely. In your careers you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.'' She got the point, starting by learning that the cleaning lady was named Dorothy.'' (Guideposts)

This week, let's try not to think of ourselves as above anyone else. Talk to some people that you wouldn't normally speak with. Some of the greatest people often serve at the lowliest jobs. 

1) Why did this professor ask this question? 
2) Do you think that Dorothy (the cleaning lady) felt that the nursing students put her down?
3) What are some ways that people who think they're important put others down?
4) What do you think of those who put others down?
5) Write down the initials of some people that you've considered "beneath you." I challenge you to pay them some positive attention this week. 

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Elton John Gets Ignored

In the early days of Rock, the popular Isley Brothers band toured Europe with a young keyboard player who wanted them to listen to the briefcase of songs he'd written. But they never did. They said, ''We figured this guy with the big glasses, how could he write something that would be funky enough for us?'' Now I'm sure they regret missing out on all those great songs. The keyboardist was perennial best-selling singer/songwriter Elton John. (Written by Steve Miller. Source: Kot, Greg, ''How the Isley Brothers became – and stayed – the first family of R & B'' Chicago Tribune, November 4, 2001, Sec. 7, p. 1.) 

We'll never know the talents of most of those who sit next to us in class or pass us in the halls. If only we were quicker to ask others about their interests than talk incessantly about our own interests, we might be astounded at the talent surrounding us. Today, let's ask several people, "What are some interests you have that not many people know about?" Then, let's be humble enough to simply listen. 

Discussion Questions:

1) Why do you think the Isley Brothers never listened to Elton John's songs?
2) How does judging people by their appearance keep us from seeing the gifts that lie beneath the exterior?
3) How could the Isley Brothers have gained something by being more humble?
4) How can we be more humble in our relationships with our classmates and teachers this week?

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"James Bond" Succeeds With Humility

I wish I could command respect like actor Sean Connery. In his early years he competed in a Mr. Universe contest and later became one of the world's most respected actors, especially known for playing James Bond.  As actor producer Kevin Costner summed up Connery as an actor, "When you're with Sean you learn pretty quickly what your own place in the galaxy is. And it pales." 

With his deep, commanding voice and muscular physique, even if he were to say something as shallow as "Golly Jeepers," people would think, "Wow, that's cool!" 

What isn't apparent to movie-goers is the humility it took to get him to the top. Let's trace Sean's humble path to stardom, beginning when he was known to everyone as Tommy. 

First, he had humble beginnings: Connery wasn't always so cool. His road to success was actually quite difficult.  You see, he grew up in the slums of Edinburgh, Scotland. His self-confidence was pretty low because his dad was not the kind to have a real relationship with. Sean missed out on the pats on the back and having a dad to tell about that spectacular soccer goal he scored. Instead, he had to help the family make a living. He had to do the family's shopping and occasionally wash the tenement stairs. He resented being denied a carefree childhood. Even as early as nine years of age he woke at 5:00 to deliver milk before school. After school he worked as a butcher's assistant.   

He had a humble education: In school he had to sit toward the front of the class, with the other "thickies" who weren't as bright as the others, although he did excel in English. He felt self-conscious comparing his social status with some of his wealthy classmates. He quit school and went to work full-time at age 13, with no qualifications. 

He worked humble jobs: He proceeded to work in a dairy stable, then transporting people in a horse-drawn cart, then taking a newspaper route.  Bored with jobs with no future, he joined the Navy to escape the humdrum and see the world. Instead, he found himself scrubbing ice-cold decks, with little chance for advancement. In under three years, he developed an ulcer that was serious enough to get him discharged. It was probably brought on by his own fears, anxieties and frustrations. 

From there, he tried other dead-end jobs like shoveling and delivering coal, digging ditches, mixing cement, polishing coffins (if he had to work late, he'd bring a pillow and sleep in a coffin!), bricklaying, cleaning a newspaper printing press. He wasn't wasting his time. He was looking for a vocation he could put his life into. 

He Began Acting at the Bottom rung. Finally, he got his first introduction to the world of acting, again starting out on the bottom rung. First he worked with the wardrobes in the evenings at a local theatre. His first acting job was carrying a spear in a touring production.  

He didn't need much money. His only transportation was a simple motorbike. He didn't need a nice place to stay, so he rented a damp, basement flat with a tiny bedroom, a thin mattress, but lined with bookshelves. The kitchen stove was the only source of heat. 

Because he struggled to get parts (during one stretch he had no parts for 7 months) he'd do odd jobs such as babysitting, with the parents throwing in extra money if he had to change a diaper. He was so impoverished that he had to sell his motorbike, replacing it with a cheap ladies' bicycle.  

But his humility paid off. His girlfriend noted that his most attractive quality was his complete lack of vanity. He was humble enough to learn from others,  reading all that respected people in the theatre told him to read, paying his limited money for lessons on elocution. When his girlfriend noted that Connery's movements were "very stoggy" in one of his films, he enrolled in movement classes taught by an ex-dancer. 

It's hard to imagine Connery in his mid-20's baby sitting and changing diapers for extra cash, getting around on a ladies' bicycle, or taking lessons on how to walk and talk correctly. But for him, humble learning and humble circumstances were the bricks that paved the road for his massive success. 

During our school years, many students resent such humble tasks as taking out the trash or flipping burgers. Some feel looked down upon because you can't afford the right car or even the school lunches. It's also easy to resent teachers who try to correct our writing or grammar or speech. This week, let's remember that you don't become James Bond overnight. Working hard at the small, humble tasks, often prepares us for the greater tasks.  (Written by Steve Miller, Copyright May 6, 2002; Source: Andrew Yule, Sean Connery: From 007 to Hollywood Icon, Donald I. Fine, Inc., New York, 1992, pp. 1-56)

Discussion Questions:

1) In what ways did Sean Connery practice humility?
2) Do you think he could have become successful without humility? Why or why not?
3) Is humility respected or looked down upon by youth today?
4) In what areas is it especially difficult to be humble?
5) What's some area of humility that you could work on this week?

Successful Coach Learns in the Trenches

Pat Riley is one of the greatest basketball coaches of all time. He was the only coach to secure 100 or more playoff victories. In reflecting back on what made him great, he thought about his small positions before he became head coach. Of these, he said, ''First, never demean the time you spend in the trenches. If you pay attention to what you're doing, you can learn an awful lot about how an organization behaves, and that can be very useful later on.'' 

''Second, use any time when you aren't on center stage to strengthen your powers of perception. Even being on the bench or working around the periphery of the Lakers was like attending a master class in professional basketball. It's strictly attitude that lets you learn.'' 

This week, let's not resent being entrusted with only small tasks. Let's do them well. Even if we're just sweeping floors somewhere near those who are great, learn everything you can from them. "Never demean the time you spend in the trenches." It pays off in the end. (Pat Riley, The Winner Within, G.P. Putnam's Sons, New York, 1993, p. 63)

Discussion Questions:

1) What do you think Pat Riley meant when he said, "Never demean the time you spend in the trenches." 
2) According to Riley, why is it so important to learn from the small tasks?
3) What are some small tasks you have to do as students that seem beneath you?
4) How could doing these tasks well pay off in the end?
5) What are some of the ways you can learn in the trenches as teens? 

Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin, Three Cups of Tea: One Man's Mission to Promote Peace...One School at a Time (New York: Penguin Books, 2006), pp. 129,130.

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One Liners

After the game, the king and the pawn go into the same box. (Italian Proverb)

Super-successful quarterback Tom Brady could easily look down on others from his lofty pedestal. But according to head coach Belichick, Brady "doesn't put himself above anybody, above the equipment manager, above the guy on the practice squad, or above a defensive player. He has respect for them doing their jobs." (Moving the Chains: Tom Brady and the Pursuit of Everything, by Charles P. Pierce (New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2006), p. 159.)

Funny Stuff

Three corporate executives were trying to define the word fame.

One said, ''''Fame is getting invited to the White House to see the president.''

The second one said, ''Fame is being invited to the White House and while you are visiting the phone rings and he doesn't answer it.''

The third executive said, ''You're both wrong. Fame is being invited to the White House to visit with the president when his Hot Line rings. He answers it, listens a minute, and then says, ''Here, it's for you.''

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A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... They must be Gods!

A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I must be a God!

Games, Activities and Clips

Defining Humility

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.  (Columnist Ann Landers)

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Humility is not thinking less of myself, but not thinking of myself at all. (Andrew Murray)

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Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in deserving them. (Aristotle)

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Someone has said that the test of a great man is the way he treats little people. (The Friendship Factor, by Alan Loy McGinnis, Augsburg Publishing House, 1979)

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Heroes are people who rise to the occasion and slip quietly away. (Tom Brokaw)

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Hide the good you do, and make known the good done to you.

Examples of Humility

The Bass Brothers, four men in Fort Worth, Texas have amassed a fortune of around $4 Billion. A University of Texas professor stated, ''If they don't make $1 million a day, they're nervous.'' What's their secret? I think it's significant that although they were all well-educated at leading universities, they have never stopped learning. According to Robert, ''The family's great strength is trying to learn from others. Sid felt there were things he couldn't do as well as people who had been in a particular field their entire career.... That has been largely our approach to find good partners.'' (Newsweek, Nov. 19, 1984) Are you humble enough to learn from others - about raising your family, investing for the future, good nutrition, and nurturing your relationship with God? (© Copyright 2002 Steve Miller - All Rights Reserved)

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Great 19th century essayist, poet and philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson said, ''Every man I meet is my superior in some way.'' How could he say this, knowing that his intellect was far greater than the great majority of people he would ever meet? He must have known that one person had learned more than him through her rich experiences, another can play an instrument better or is a superior builder. 

If a man of the stature of Emerson could see the great qualities of others, shouldn't it be easier for us regular people to do the same? Wouldn't that one attitude keep us from looking down on anyone? (Written by Steve Miller. Quote of Emerson found in The Friendship Factor, by Alan Loy McGinnis, Augsburg Publishing House, 1979, pp. 97-98)

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''Warren [successful investor Warren Buffett] says that if he'd been born a few thousand years ago, he'd probably have been some animal's lunch. But he was born into an age that has a stock market and rewards Warren for his unique understanding of the market.'' (Bill Gates, Column, New York Times Syndicate, March 12, 1997)

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Oxford professor C.S. Lewis was one of the most successful authors in history. But according to some of his lifelong writing friends, he'd never put himself above them when they would critique one another's writing. Although they were far less successful than he was, he never threw his weight around.

According to one of them, Owen Barfield, ''I never recall a single remark, a single word or silence, a single look.... which would go to suggest that he felt his opinion was entitled to more respect than that of his old friends... I wonder how many famous men there have been of whom this could truthfully be said.'' (Barfield quote found in The Friendship Factor, by Alan Loy McGinnis, Augsburg Publishing House, 1979, pp. 63-64)

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While some fools are deceived into thinking they know everything, the truly wise realize how little they really know.

The Need for Humility

When the space shuttle Challenger lifted into the sky and blew up seventy-three seconds into its flight, the world was shocked. Most of us have seen the videotape of that terrible moment many times. And we can recreate the picture in our minds of a deep blue sky marked with twisted trails of smoke and large chunks of metal plummeting toward the ocean. And we know, as we recall the grim specter of the explosion, that among the falling pieces were the bodies of some of America's finest men and women.

Most of us also know that the investigations into the cause of the tragedy pointed out some serious shortfalls in human judgment and materials management. The New York Times put it frankly: the ultimate cause of the space shuttle disaster was pride. A group of top managers failed to listen carefully to the warnings of those down the line who were concerned about the operational reliability of certain parts of the booster rocket under conditions of abnormal stress. The people in charge were confident that they knew best and that they should not change the launch schedules. They were wrong. (Gordon MacDonald, Rebuilding Your Broken World.)

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If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants. (Isaac Newton, scientist)

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''And after all, of what use is this Parade of Appearance, for which so much is risked, so much is suffered? It cannot promote Health, or ease Pain; it makes no increase of merit in the person, it creates envy, it hastens misfortune.'' (Benjamin Franklin, from Autobiography, pp. 222, 223)

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Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one. (Malcolm Forbes)

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The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. (Bertrand Russell)

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It takes humility to seek feedback. It takes wisdom to understand it, analyze it, and appropriately act on it. (Stephen R. Covey First Things First)

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Humility is the only true wisdom by which we prepare our minds for all the possible changes of life. (George Arliss)

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It is in the character of very few men to honor without envy a friend who has prospered. (Aeschylus)

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''I was impressed that Bill [Gates] was able to admit he was wrong. If someone has a better way or a better technology, Bill's very open to that.'' (Julie Pitta, ''Microsoft's Other Boy Genius,'' Forbes, August 2, 1993)

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''Pride breakfasted with Plenty, dined with Poverty, and supped with Infamy.'' (Benjamin Franklin, from his Autobiography, pp. 222, 223)

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Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are. (Malcolm Forbes)

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Quick Test For Pride: Think of the most nerdy person on your campus. Are you willing to be seen with and spend time with that person? If not, you've got a problem with pride.

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''Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time.'' (St. Louis' Lou Brock)

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Benjamin Franklin found that in promoting great projects, he could often go further by presenting them, not as his own ideas, but as the proposal of a group of people. In his own words, ''I therefore put myself as much as I could out of sight, and stated it as a Scheme of a Number of Friends, who had requested me to go about and propose it to such as they thought Lovers of Reading. In this way my Affair went on more smoothly…frequent Successes. Thus, don't present one's self as the Purposer of any useful Project that might be suppos'd to raise one's Reputation in the smallest degree above that of one's Neighbors, when one has need of their Assistance to accomplish that Project.'' (Autobiography, p. 87)

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Grades can become a pride trip, a competition. One student at Ohio State University was so brilliant that she set out to read every book in the school's enormous library. But competition and pride were two of her motivators. In order to top another guy's grade point average, she dated him and tried to keep him up late the night before important tests. (Fortunately, the story has a happy ending. As she was reading through the reference section of the library, she came to the Bibles, read one, and gave her life to God!) (From a professor's personal testimony)

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''Out of 1,435 Fortune 500 companies that renowned management researcher Jim Collins studied over a five-year period, only 11 achieved and sustained greatness--garnering stock returns at least three times the market's--for 15 years after a major transition period.''

So what made these 11 companies different? According to Collins, they each had a ''Level 5'' leader. Although a ''Level 5'' leader exhibits lots of characteristics in common with other leaders, he also exhibits an interesting ''combination of deep personal humility with intense professional will.'' Here's how these qualities look:

Intense professional will = They're totally intolerant of mediocrity and will do whatever they can to get results. They select great people to take their place when they retire, so that the company will do even better in the future.

Deep personal humility = When the company succeeds, they give others the credit or point to other external factors. When things go badly, they take the blame. ''They also act quietly, calmly, and determinedly,'' not flashy charisma.

(Rewritten by Steve Miller From Zooba's Harvard Business School Publishing channel ''Level 5 Leadership: The Triumph of Humility and Fierce Resolve,'' Jan. 29, 2002)

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"I used to think that I was in touch with my inner self, and then I realized that was my inner ego." (Madonna, MTV interview, 1998)

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Harvard Business School real estate professor William J., Poorvu warns us how real estate investors lose money. He states, 

"The last pitfall is ego. Get a partner or advisor who is as much like Eeyore as possible – gloomy, slow-moving, even dour. And listen to that person." (Poorvu, William J., The Real Estate Game – The Intelligent Guide to Decision Making and Investment, The Free Press, NY, NY, 1999, p. 190)

Growing in Humility

The secret, Joey, is to know you're somebody without thinking your somebody. (Dennis the Menace)

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Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. (Famous Historian Will Durant)

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We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything. (Thomas Edison, scientist & inventor)

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Some people have just enough education to get puffed up about it. Others become so intelligent that they realize how ignorant they are. As Albert Einstein once wrote: 

As a human being, one has been endowed with just enough intelligence to be able to see clearly how utterly inadequate that intelligence is when confronted with what exists. If such humility could be conveyed to everybody, the world of human activities would be more appealing.'' (From a Sept., 1932 letter to Queen Elizabeth, found in Albert Einstein: The Human Side, Selected and edited by Helen Dukas and Banesh Hoffman, Princeton University Press, 1979, p. 48)

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Benjamin Franklin made a list of virtues in his younger years and worked diligently at attaining these virtues during his life. But he felt that he failed in the area of pride. In his own words, ''In reality there is perhaps no one of our natural Passions so hard to subdue as Pride. Disguise it, struggle with it, beat it down, stifle it, mortify it as much as one pleases, it is still alive, and will every now and then peep out and show itself. You will see it perhaps often in this History. For even if I could conceive that I had completely overcome it, I should probably be proud of my Humility.'' (Autobiography, p. 103)